Archive for the ‘Masters of the Universe’ Tag

The Killing Floor (3)


“Ooh that’s so rich…  Mmmm…. Delicious!”


“I’m sorry… Do you want some chocolate?  Only Justin raided Harrods in his lunch hour – he got a hamper with some amazing handmade eggs and things – and I don’t think there’s a lot left after the back office got their sticky fingers into it…”


“You okay?  You seem very quiet today.  Looking forward to the Easter break I bet – chance to recharge the batteries?”

“Nah; I was just thinking about Jesus.”



“I never knew you were religious?”

“I’m not… I was just thinking how much me and him have in common – that’s all.”

“You and Jesus Christ?!”

“Yeh…  just think about it… we’re both Masters of the Universe; I was sent to the office near Temple tube once to sharpen up procedure by the money lenders – well, the Head of Corporate; I was cast into the wilderness for two months by the FSA for that ahem, minor technical indiscretion: I’ve been crucified in the press and parliament on a regular basis for what I do – and I can pretty much turn anything fishy into a good deal.  We’re both concerned with profits – even if he does spell his differently: I also had a very demandin’ old man who thought I could shit miracles to order.  Oh; and you’re one of my disciples – although I haven’t decided which one yet – and before you say that there’s only four of you in this section – that’s restructuring for you… and for that you can blame Giuseppe Vialli who is fresh on the board following the Euro crisis: so there you go… neither me nor Jesus could get on with things without the interference of the Romans…”

“You can’t be serious?!”

“And why not?”

“It’s just not right…”


“Well… because… because…”

“Because you can’t tell if I’m for real… Can you?  Which is why I’m the top dealer here and you have to go and get the coffees in…  Make mine an Ethiopian: three shots!  If that chocolate is as rich as you say I’ll need something to wash it down with…”

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