Archive for the ‘Match Fit’ Category

Neil Warnock’s Football Academy

Do you secretly pine for the good old days of English football?  When Sky was where you hoofed the ball?  When your Full-Back left his stud marks on the Fancy Dan visiting forward in the first thirty seconds?  When Names on the backs of shirts contained only one vowel?  And the only Vanishing Spray was froth from the can of beer you threw into the visiting supporters?

"So you get right up to the visiting centre-half 'till you can see the whites of his eyes, check the ref's not lookin' - then you nut him."

“So you get right up to the visiting centre-half ’til you can see the whites of his eyes, check the ref’s not lookin’ – then you nut him.”

Then you’ll love Neil Warnock’s Football Academy.  Pithy (I said pithy Neil) comments on issues and tactics in the modern game from someone who’s been there and seen it and kicked it into row 37.

"It's all in 'ere son!  Big balls - that's what!"

“It’s all in ‘ere son! Big balls – that’s what!”

Neil on The Number Ten Role…

“What’s all this fookin’ crap about the number ten?!  All those TV pundits sound like a load of bloody little girls talkin’ about One Direction!  Fiddly-diddly player in the hole?  Not for me!  My number ten would be two number fives… two big centre-halves to ride shotgun for the big man up front.  Lots of forty-yard balls into the box – three to aim for – luvly.  Now that’s what you call proper bloody football!”

Ya-Ya-Ya-Ya Tou-re; Ya-Ya-Ya-Ya Tou-re…

YayaToure“It’s just not fair… I wanted sweets… not tweets and at Barca they gave me candles and everything!”

Sing When Your Winning…

old-trafford The new Singing section at Old Trafford may have caused controversy with its proposed relocation of some season ticket holders… however, it has already proved inspirational to Manchester United Manager David Moyes who has called for a Football playing section to be established…


David Moyes“It’s amazin’ really how this idea got me thinking… ah mean there’s this green space right in front of oor eyes called a pitch that’s about ooh, 116 x 76 yards – so there’s lots aye room to start playin’ football… Büttner, Cleverley, Young, Nani, Smalling – oh and at least a dozen more: in fact you name ‘em and we could get rid of ‘em!  I’m amazed Sr’Alex didnae try it  ”

Wayne Rooney: Angry & Confused

wayne-coleen_“That man’s just evil like… I’m tearin’ me hair out after five months of this… He’s told us that if I want a transfer I’ve got to put it in writing!  Writing!!  Can you believe it?!  Yeh… actual writing!!!  I tell ya Col I’m never gonna get meself away from Old Trafford… That fookin’ Moyesy… he’s messin’ wiv me ‘ead babe; just messin’ wiv me ‘ead!”

%d bloggers like this: